Yeah, but…
I just got back from an Improv class I’m taking.
One of the things we discussed today is how it is useful in Improv not to deny, disagree or question what your partner is doing when you’re on the stage. It kind of kills the energy and doesn’t expand the story.
Here’s an example:
You: Man I’m starting this blog today!
Me: Yeah, that’s cool, but it’s not going to work. There’s too much competition.
You: Yeah, but it will work. This is why…blah blah blah
The interesting thing is that this kind of communication is really common. Generally disagreeing, deflating or responding with a “Yeah, but…” kind of sentence happens a lot. In fact, it was very difficult for many of the people in class to break this habit.
In Improv taking the time to respond to someone’s denial doesn’t doesn’t really go anywhere. It’s not normally useful in advancing the storyline, and ultimately is not that entertaining.
In life too, communication through disagreement and denial doesn’t really go anywhere either. One person is excited about something, and the other is essentially using energy to try and break down that excitement.
Not to say that there’s no place for disagreement. The thing I found interesting in class today was how habitual denial was so commonplace.
Now that I’ve become sensitive to listening for denials (even outside of class), I see it going on a lot.
I wonder what the inherent usefulness of it is (if any). I’m going to try and avoid denials for the next month or so and see how it affects my communication and relationships. Heck, I notice I even do it to myself sometimes when I have I idea. I’ll try and avoid that too.
Interesting idea, but…